Date: 2/28/2011
I have been very slack this month with putting up some posts. I have a reason though! I spent 10 days in Thailand! It was amazing--but very tiring! I didn't do a beach vacation (although parts of me wish I did--mostly everytime I look down and see paste-y white skin) but I decided to do a Trek through Northern Thailand, spending the nights with native tribes people of the land. I will put photos and memories up of these adventures, but right now I'm going to go back to the daily life of living in Gunsan, South Korea. A couple reasons: 1) it is easier to write about Gunsan life. Shorter blog posts and more succinct stories. 2) Thailand is a big adventure--with many many photos. It takes some time not only to process everything that went on in 10 days, but also to organize it all into neat, orderly blog posts. I'm simply still processing much of what I saw and did in. And besides, some of the activities I had friends take photos and they haven't uploaded them on facebook yet!
So, back to the ins-and-outs of Gunsan, South Korea!
This month is when many contracts end and new ones begin. Which means I have been saying good bye to many foreign teachers! It is weird to make friends after such a short time, and then say, "Have a good life because most likely I will never see you again! Wish you the best!" It makes the time here--and the people you meet--that much more precious. But on the other hand, it can also make you more guarded. You find yourself thinking, "Well, why make friends with these people at all? They're going to be leaving shortly anyway? Why go to the effort!" I know, it sounds cynical and defeatist, but it is weary to see people leave. It is almost self-preservation--guarding your heart a little bit.
I had one friend tell me "Friends are your friends for either a season, a reason, or life." It is so unbelievably true. You get some friend who are in your life for just a short period of time. Like some of my friends that I have been saying good bye to here in Korea. Some people are friends because they serve a purpose in your life, to get you from point A to point B, or to make you stronger, or make you learn a lesson. I have had a few of these types of friends in the last 6 months. And some friends, the truly special ones, are with you for the long run. I do not have many of these friends--I don't have any friends from elementary school, and only 2 that I actively try to stay in contact with from high school. But I am realizing that I made some Life Friends from college. (Meghan, Amanda, Kate--you know who you are! LOVE!) And these friends make my heart smile. But, enough sap, on with my blog entry.
One friend that I realize was a Season Friend was Jessica. Jessica was a great friend: she showed me around Gunsan in my first month, helped me navigate the Seoul Subway for the first time on my first trip to Seoul, we had weekly coffee and games night. She was a wealth of knowledge as she was working on her second contract (aka, had been here for longer than 1 year) and I generally got along with her handedly.
I don't doubt that we were friends. But...like all things, time moves on and things change. It's kind of a long story, and I don't know all the details--in fact, I don't know any of the details--but Jess is gone now. She has removed herself from facebook, isn't answer texts/phone calls (I think she doesn't have a phone anymore--at least, not a Korean phone), and I haven't heard from her in over a month. I have talked to some friends in Gunsan and they all are confused and a little bewildered by her disappearance. Some have been in contact with her family, so we know that she is safe--she hasn't been kidnapped or sold into the sex trade or anything like that--but we do not know where she is. It is disconcerting to know that someone you call a friend would leave without saying good-bye. I'm at the point now where I'm sincerely trying to give her the benefit of the doubt, but I just want to know that she is OK. Everyone has their reasons, and I know something pretty major had to happen for her to leave--especially like this, but that doesn't mean it doesn't hurt.
Before she left, she and I went to Seoul and had a jolly good time going to see a show called Jump and just spending some time together. She had made a point of talking about relationships and talking about friends being "season, reason, or life." I don't know if it is true or not, but maybe she had been warning me that she was leaving, in a small way... ? Or I could be looking into our conversation too much. I just know that I will miss her friendship.
Another people change that is going on is school is starting up again. Which means the Korean teachers are getting ready for a new year. Korean teachers move schools every 5 years--I don't know why, they just change schools every 5 years. And some younger teachers do not have permanent schools--they must go to a school that needs their expertise. Which means I have said good-bye to a couple really good friends. All the young teachers that I had made friends with--My "brother" Tae-hee, Sung Sik, Minhee--have changed schools! This makes me very sad! Very sad indeed! Also, some teachers have come up on their 5 years--like my winter camp co-teacher Mrs Lee! I did not know this until I came into school this morning and was told! I felt so bad that I couldn't say goodbye to her, but I think I have her email so I will be able to send her a quick farewell.
But with the change brings in new teachers. We are getting a new English teacher--and guess what?! I already know him! How would I know him? Well, you see, he's my LANDLORD! Mr Kim (not related to my other co-teacher Ms Kim) is going to be my co-teacher! Which is just going to be all sorts of weird. How do I feel about this? A little uncomfortable. I mean, I love Mr Kim. He is a sweet man and sincerely a nice person--a great landlord. But it brings home life and school life just a little too close in my comfort zone. In America, home and work life don't really mix. But now, they are definately going to mix. I love Koreans, but they tend to be just the slightest bit gossip-y. And, as the only foreign teacher at my school, I think I am talked about a lot. I am not tooting my horn here...it is just something that happens. For example, I have lost weight while in Korea. I told Ms Kim exactly how much weight I lost, and the next day I had 4 different teachers (some who I didn't even know) come up to me and tell me that either A) I was looking good for having lost weight, B) I needed to eat more because they heard I lost weight, C) wanted to know how I had lost so much weight. The teachers aren't talking about me in any malicious manner, and I really think they just want to make sure that I am looked after, cared for, and feel welcomed. Which, I do. I love my school. It is just funny.
So I am understandably a little nervous that the man who knows the going-ons of my home life will be a teacher at my school. There's more reasons I am nervous. I had a Korean boyfriend this last month, and the first time I said goodbye to him on the doorstep, the next morning, Mr Kim found me while I was taking the garbage out (a very short walk 2 flights up and down stairs) and made a point of telling me to be careful who I trust and that not all men are nice, and that he is glad I am making friends who are Korean. I really don't want Mr Kim to share every time I kiss a boy on my doorstep with my school teachers. But I don't think he will. It is just me borrowing trouble.
But it definitely makes life more fun, right?!
Talking about fun, it was a good month because I had a boyfriend. At least, I think you would call him a boyfriend. It was a short relationship--bad timing, I think was the main problem--but it was definitely informative and fun. There will a couple posts about him--just enough to share some funny stories.
I am looking forward to school to start, getting back on a schedule, and, ironically enough, being at work. I think it is a great sign that I actually enjoy my work. Even though I don't always feel comfortable as a teacher, I love my school and fellow co-workers. It won't be the same as last year, but it will be something new, and something different, and that, in and of itself, will be fun.
UPDATE: The day I posted this blog, my friend who had disappear reappeared. She is alive and well--just went off the grid for a while. *shrug*
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